I always feel a slight sense of discontentment
or disappointment
when
I find myself saying or thinking, “next time.”
Maybe it’s because I’m frustrated with myself
at how it always seems like I’m trying to squeeze too much
into a single day [or sentence];
setting expectations for myself that are way too high to climb
and I also wonder whether I have
(but hope I haven’t)
placed similar expectations on the other people in my life.
I honestly don’t mean to,
it’s just that I’m tired of justifying to myself why
“there’s always next time,”
when I don’t want next times,
I want right nows.
Kayfucius 