Posted in life, New Work, Poetry, Self-discovery and growth

Know Me

Dinner tonight was

Ben & Jerry’s

and

a shot of rum;

Not melancholy or troubled,

not even stressed.

Just…reminding myself

that sometimes it’s okay

to eat and drink things that are bad for me

for the good of my own pleasure.

Now and again, indulgence is necessary.

And besides,

why in the hell would I ever

model my entire life after

beings of

flesh and blood and flaws

who don’t even know me

like I do?

Posted in life, Poetry, Uncategorized

Funny

Funny how
the people you’re born
unto;

The people you’re born and raised
with
are more stressful than
the almost-strangers you speak to in passing
each day…

Funny how some days
secret parts of me
occasionally wish
those strangers were
my family –

At least most of them
are always trying
to get to know me,
instead of all the time
assuming

they already do.

Posted in life, New Work, Poetry

Killswitch

You like to push buttons

detonate triggers,

throw switches.

You like being surrounded by

chaos and confusion;

Volatility –

Your victims never see you coming

because you mask your intent

with pretty words

and intermittent affection

to get  what you  want…

means to ends –

We were only friends

when you had something to gain

from our companionship.

I pulled the killswitch long ago –

I just never initiated its sequences

…until now.

 

17 May 2020
Posted in life, Poetry, Self-discovery and growth

Conversations with the Moon

I told the moon

she looks beautiful tonight;

She acted so shy

and hid herself from sight.

So then I told her I’m grateful

for her light –

And she smiled so bright

I had to shield my eyes.

Then she whispered to me

that

I shouldn’t be afraid to see

I thought she meant

visual sight

At first…

Then I realized I’d been afraid

She’d seen me at my worst.

But even when blind

and out of my depth,

she implored,

Remember there’s still so much left

To do…

Understanding reigns, above all else;

I never needed eyes

To see myself.

Posted in life, love, Poetry

Love Song

You always remind me of

those old love songs

we listened to

as we drove around

the city

warm sunlight and summer breeze on our faces

talking about life

and how we imagined

our future selves.

The way our smiles outshone the sun;

even as it set

and our words were the stars

lighting the quiet sky

that reminded us of the time

we lost track of,

wild and bright and neverending…

we were so young

back then

but the music we lived

and loved

and made

together

bound us to

the old souls

we share.

Our kiss

eternal supernova

flames and color

and light.

Our laughter strikes the sweetest chords.

You’ve always been

my favorite love song.

Posted in life, Poetry

Wine Down (Today Fell)

Suddenly,

today fell

onto me –

crashing down all at once,

a rockfall

physical and mental weight;

it’s heavy

there, but not actually –

each tear

a hammer drop

and for the first time,

I couldn’t take it

as it all caved in…

Grief;

my solid, silent companion

all I could feel.

At least

I can’t find her shadows anymore,

not as numb –

I should put this

wine down.

 

08 April 2020

Posted in life, Poetry, Random, Self-discovery and growth

Watch Me Rise

I never get to write when I want,
someone always has a need –
And I bleached my favorite layering shirt
It only sorta kinda hurt.

I may need a cup of tea.
Or maybe a little time for me;
Could be that I’m internalizing anxiety and worry –
still meditating,
but lately, in a hurry.

My hair’s getting long now
and it’s in need of a trim
My scalp is sore
send moisture please – hydration?
Prognosis is grim.

I gained 5 pounds,
for the most part, I like where it went…
but this pudge on my waist ain’t taking the same hints.

I wanna walk,
go clear my mind
spend time with the moon
but there’s just too much going on in the world
this time.
Soon come, and coming soon…

I wanna blow trees
like a mischievous breeze
follow my thought streamers
through subconscious skies –
ride the clouds…

Watch me rise.

As long as I always
know my soul
I’ll simply find other ways
to hold myself in control.

My mind, my spirit
gently roam
but I never get
too far from home.

Posted in life, Poetry

Other Than Here.

Maybe I shouldn’t read

right now,

but books are one of the only escapes

I have –

Hiatus from the blue shadows

of life’s ups and downs.

They’re the thing

that allow me to lose

all awareness of the world

outside my mind

if only for just

a moment.

The universe inside

a home away [from home].

Books are my

down by the oceanfront,

watching the waves

carry my thoughts away;

Justification for the tears

I cry for the world

but don’t want

them to see.

They are the passport

to the places

I can’t freely travel.

Books help

feed the wanton need

to be someplace

other than

here.